"Suburgatory" Review

I loved Suburgatory! It was so cute. For all of you non- suburban people, here are some of the true facts. Some of them are quite shocking.

• Puke colored houses- This was brought up when the main character Tessa saw the color of her new house. For whatever reason, suburban house contractors like the shades of puke.
• Really quiet mornings- This was brought up when Tessa woke up and it was dead silent. That is too true. In my neighborhood, the loudest noises we hear are a garbage or recycling truck and that's only 2 days a week.
• Mother, Daughter Mani Pedis- This was brought up when Tessa was stereotyping the suburbs. This isn' too popular for my age group, but when I was 10 or younger. It's more for fun then the status of it.
• Frozen coffee drinks- This was brought up when Tessa was stereotyping the suburbs. I didn't realize this was such a big thing till this show. We have 3 iced coffee places in my mall! I love frozen coffee and drink it every time I go to my mall... which is a lot. Wow... I'm a stereotype!
• Orange people with light blond hair- This was brought up when Tessa's dad reunited with his high school friend. A lot of people people have these orangy tans- some are natural oddly- and have light blond hair. I have blond hair, but it's natural. They didn't mention that girls also have almost black hair.
• Texting without looking up- This was brought up when a girl fell in a pool while texting. Everyone does this in my school. Everyone.
• Moms with boob jobs- This was brought up every minute. Not every mom has a boob job, but more than the average town.
• Stay at home moms that drive SUVs- This was brought up every minute. I know a lot of stay at home moms that have SUVs. Not my family though, we have a mini van. (:
• Energy drinks- This was brought up every minute. They specifically used Red Bull in Suburgatory, but only really guys drink Red Bull here. Most girls drink Monster. I don't drink energy drinks though. They're gross. And give you acne.
• Lots of hair extensions- This was brought up when one of the suburban moms was showing off her daughter's room. A lot of girls in my school wear extensions, but I like natural hair.
•  Flat ironed hair- This was brought up when Tessa was talking about one of the popular girls. Almost every girl in my school owns a flat iron. I have owned 2 of my own flat irons so far. There's just something about straight hair here...
• Tiny clothes- This was brought up when they went to the mall. Everyone in my school owns a pair of short shorts. Gym class is like a Soffee shorts extravaganza. I probably get yelled at by my mom every day about my clothes being too revealing. Don't blame me. Blame the suburbs.
• The "dad couch"- This was also brought up at the mall. At the mall there's always a couch outside the stores that the dad's sit on. My step- dad's favorite one is the one outside Forever 21.
•  Everyone wears a push- up bra- This was brought up at the mall. It's hard to find girls wearing sports bras here. Most girls get their first push up after they get a training bra. I only really on push ups and a t- shirt bra.
• Perverted boys- This is brought up when they show a- believe it or not- a perverted boy. True statement. Nuff said.
• People give each other bras- This is brought up when a mom gives Tessa a bra. My friends and I do this all the time! I have probably 3 donated bras.

I hope you liked this post! That's all for now. Till then,

Bless ya! Love ya!

Kailyn Wolffe

Day 3? More like day dream.

Okay, for starters, I was watching Modern Family yesterday- LOVE that show- and I saw a commercial for this new show called Subergatory. Basically, the show is about some girl who moves from New York City to a suburb and everyone in the suburb is pretty much a slut with a nose job. So while I'm watching this commercial, there's one scene where the girl end her super popular school "buddy" are at the mall and I realize something.

I own the pair of "slutty" shorts! I guess I'm more suburban stereotype than I thought. I just thought I should tell you guys that. Now let's get back to all my school stuff.
I almost missed my bus, again. (I hope someone picked up on my Forrest Gump reference.) It's honestly not my fault. My bus is supposed to come at 7:50, except yesterday it came at 7:40. So today, I left at 7:35 to be there early, and right after I'm in view of my bus stop the bus is already there! Ugh, I hate my bus already. I guess I'll leave at 7:30 tomorrow.
Today *Katy asked m to walk with her to gym! I felt so special! Now let's get to the title. So in gym class- everything happens in gym class!- I discovered that my best friend *Lexi has a super hot friend named *Dylan. I introduce myself and he shook my hand- very gentleman like. I thought had never seen this guy before, but when I get to Spanish class? *Dylan! He is- as the Spanish would say- muy caliente. I seriously hope we have some group projects in Spanish.
Speaking of Spanish class, my teacher is offering this program where she takes 50 kids from my high school and we get to travel around Paris, southern France, and Milan for 2 weeks this summer! I would love to visit Milan mainly because it is one of the fashion capitals of the world! Plus, I want to be a fashion reporter for a magazine one day. So far, things look optimistic! I'll keep you guys posted.

Bless ya! Love ya!

Kailyn Wolffe

*All of the names listed are NOT real names. They are just made up.